57. Excerpt from Anthony Stephens’ Mood Journal

September 28 2004,

Morning: 6 out of 10

Afternoon: 7 out of 10

Night: 8 out of 10

Aced General Psych this past semester and been thinking about psychology ever since.

I got the hang of the theory and all that, I think. It’s interesting stuff when you get down to it, the human mind and how it operates, how it views itself.

The class ended up being a broader version of everything I’ve been talking to Doc Silver about for the past couple of months. It all makes a lot more sense to me now. More sense than the things I’m learning about in my other classes. More interesting than “Macroeconomics” or “Pre-1900 British Literature” or “Research and Study Tactics.”

When you look into people’s heads—when you can see how they tick, you start to realize that all the things people do every day really are just things. Whether the person’s out slitting people’s throats or building space rockets, doesn’t really matter.

I mean, it matters to society, but what really is society? Nothing. Society’s existence is just as crazy a belief as people who think they’re the second coming of Christ and everybody should down cyanide-laced Kool-Aid with them.

What’s the difference?

In those people’s minds, they’re doing exactly what they should and want to be doing at that moment. Just like society does. Which, honestly, makes it pretty hard to distinguish between what’s legitimately evil or just plain fucking insane. Maybe there is no difference. Maybe “evil” isn’t really as evil as we think…

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